Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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