The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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