Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
