we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
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