Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
