how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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