Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
