so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
