Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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