new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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