I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
