it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
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