i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
