I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize