C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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