They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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