matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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