It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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