You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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