Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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