I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
