Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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