Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize