why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
either way he was missing a nipple.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
