Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
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