it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
I forgot how hot balto sounded
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
