i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
