the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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