Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
