Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize