belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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