nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Are my feet made of real feet?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
