I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize