Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
