google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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