New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
