But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
