She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
