OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i love accidental penises.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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