Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize