I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize