Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
