I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
