if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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