the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
