What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
