Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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