What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize