the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
