Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
