fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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